Imagining a Better Future: Empowering Single Moms Through Vision and Practical Steps
Send us a textImagine turning your dreams into reality simply by envisioning a better future. This episode of Single Moms United, I share how a simple act of imagination helped me set achievable life goals, moving beyond the monotonous day-to-day grind. Join me as we uncover practical advice and relatable stories that showcase the transformative power of imagination. Learn how stepping out of your comfort zone can open doors to new possibilities, not just for you but for your children a...
Imagine turning your dreams into reality simply by envisioning a better future. This episode of Single Moms United, I share how a simple act of imagination helped me set achievable life goals, moving beyond the monotonous day-to-day grind. Join me as we uncover practical advice and relatable stories that showcase the transformative power of imagination. Learn how stepping out of your comfort zone can open doors to new possibilities, not just for you but for your children as well.
Equip yourself with actionable strategies and insights to navigate the next three to five years with confidence and clarity. Tune in to ignite your imagination and set a clear destination for your journey through single motherhood.
It's not how you arrived at the title, but what you do with it.
Show Transcript
WEBVTT
00:00:03.446 --> 00:00:15.051 Hey ladies, welcome to the Single Moms United podcast, where it's not about how you arrived at the single mom title, but what you do with it.
00:00:15.051 --> 00:00:31.969 This podcast is designed to encourage and motivate and invite critical thinking regarding your parenting skills, so I always try to provide some example of my own life experiences.
00:00:31.969 --> 00:00:38.084 So hopefully you or someone else can be motivated and say you know what?
00:00:38.084 --> 00:00:42.973 Hmm, let me think about that and how I can apply that to my life.
00:00:42.973 --> 00:00:50.606 Now, keep in mind, this is not a one-size-fits-all Now, if this is your first time joining, welcome.
00:00:50.606 --> 00:00:55.121 And if you're a repeat listener, thank you, thank you.
00:00:55.121 --> 00:01:04.066 And hopefully you are finding a value add in these episodes and that you're able to take it away and say you know what.
00:01:04.066 --> 00:01:08.427 I'm going to try this or I feel more motivated now.
00:01:08.427 --> 00:01:15.524 I was feeling down, but now I have another reason to reconsider things and you know what.
00:01:15.524 --> 00:01:21.700 That's what it's all about, and I've always set a specific goal of mine.
00:01:21.700 --> 00:01:33.909 If just one young lady comes back and says this was an encouragement to me, I'm now more motivated than I was, that right, there is enough for me.
00:01:33.909 --> 00:01:53.132 Comes back and says I feel better and if you want to tell me, you can visit singlemomsunitedpodcast com and leave me some notes there or some some comments there, or you can visit my YouTube page and you can also leave me some comments there.
00:01:53.132 --> 00:01:55.489 Would love to hear from you, ok, all right.
00:01:55.560 --> 00:02:12.008 So last week I talked about using the letter I and extracting words from the letter I, and I started with inspire and inspiration and then identity knowing your identity and your image.
00:02:12.008 --> 00:02:21.711 Last week was kind of part two to the identity episode that I provided and where I said you are now a leader.
00:02:21.711 --> 00:02:39.993 You are a leader of your child Maybe that's not the appropriate word to use, but you're now an authority and I use the word leadership because that's what they do and so I listed out all of the characteristics, or at least most of them, of what a good leader is.
00:02:39.993 --> 00:02:46.252 If you did not get to hear that episode, there's still time, it's still out there, it's not going anywhere.
00:02:46.252 --> 00:02:56.070 Go back and take a listen and listen about what a good leader is and understanding the traits of a good leader or a person in authority.
00:02:56.070 --> 00:02:58.527 That's who you are now.
00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:07.530 This week's episode is all about the journey, and with the journey there has to be a destination.
00:03:07.530 --> 00:03:17.842 When we think about leadership destination and our journey we also have to have an imagination to get to that destination.
00:03:17.842 --> 00:03:25.895 And no, I'm not writing a poem, but we have to incorporate imagination.
00:03:25.895 --> 00:03:29.210 Have you ever imagined anything in your life?
00:03:29.210 --> 00:03:35.032 That's another way of saying goals or having vision on where you want to be.
00:03:35.032 --> 00:03:37.187 Or are you just taking it day by day?
00:03:37.187 --> 00:03:40.691 If you're taking it day by day, I guess that's okay.
00:03:41.360 --> 00:03:53.070 It's like being on a treadmill With the treadmill, you're just walking in place, whereas if you actually get out and walk, you're going to see more things.
00:03:53.070 --> 00:04:18.406 If you went around and say I'm going to walk around the neighborhood, I'm going to go to the mall and walk wherever, you're actually seeing more things, you're being exposed to different things, whereas if you're on a treadmill, you're just staying in the same place, you're getting your steps in, but you're not seeing anything, and so you have to think about that.
00:04:18.406 --> 00:04:26.187 Mom, are you comfortable with having the treadmill mentality, or do you want to say you know what?
00:04:26.187 --> 00:04:29.262 I want to get out and see the neighborhood.
00:04:29.262 --> 00:04:34.954 I want to get out and walk around and see different sites and scenes?
00:04:34.954 --> 00:04:38.487 Right, and you'd be surprised things you'll see.
00:04:38.487 --> 00:04:40.773 You'll see little animals running around.
00:04:40.773 --> 00:04:44.869 You'll see people different people around.
00:04:44.869 --> 00:04:55.721 You'll see different kinds of cars You'll see, have all different kinds of scenery when you're out walking in the community, right?
00:04:55.721 --> 00:04:57.625 So that's the first thing.
00:04:57.625 --> 00:05:04.507 So that's why you have to have an imagination, ma'am, because you do want to go somewhere.
00:05:04.507 --> 00:05:06.892 Why do you want to go somewhere?
00:05:06.892 --> 00:05:14.112 You're a mom and you are in an authoritative role and you have children.
00:05:14.112 --> 00:05:17.161 They're watching and guess what?
00:05:17.161 --> 00:05:24.891 Ultimately, you have to release them into the world.
00:05:24.891 --> 00:05:37.514 You have to, and they have to be equipped Uh-huh, and if you have the treadmill mentality that's actually going to hurt your children.
00:05:37.514 --> 00:05:47.103 You have to look at it holistically as far as where you want to go, realistically as far as where you want to go.
00:05:47.103 --> 00:06:00.374 So that's what I want to talk about today is imagination, establishing a destination, and then, finally, I'm going to recommend some tools, some things you can do to help get you there and to keep you on track.
00:06:00.699 --> 00:06:12.908 Again, today I'm talking about imagination, destination, and it's also it's all about forming new ideas, imagining what could be.
00:06:12.908 --> 00:06:21.427 You know, when I first moved out and got my apartment with my kids, when I moved out, I was nervous, I was extremely nervous.
00:06:21.427 --> 00:06:25.834 Finally, on my own, I'm out with two kids, me and just the kids.
00:06:25.834 --> 00:06:33.093 People gave me furniture and different things to help me as I'm starting out on my own.
00:06:33.093 --> 00:06:38.132 So, as a result of different people giving me things, things didn't match.
00:06:38.132 --> 00:06:40.000 My furniture didn't match Me.
00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:42.685 Being me is like they're kids.
00:06:42.685 --> 00:06:45.112 So why do you need stuff to match, right?
00:06:45.112 --> 00:06:48.404 They're going to spill Kool-Aid on it or be eaten on.
00:06:48.404 --> 00:06:50.129 So, anyway, that's another story.
00:06:50.129 --> 00:06:56.288 One of the things I imagined as I visited other people's houses was matching furniture.
00:06:56.288 --> 00:07:01.302 What would my life look like if I had matching furniture?
00:07:01.302 --> 00:07:07.733 Not only just imagining just having matching furniture.
00:07:07.733 --> 00:07:10.502 How long was I going to be there, right?
00:07:10.502 --> 00:07:14.151 So initially I did have the treadmill mentality.
00:07:14.151 --> 00:07:14.992 You know.
00:07:14.992 --> 00:07:19.904 Just take it day by day as the kids get or got older.
00:07:19.904 --> 00:07:23.769 You know you got to start thinking about those next steps.
00:07:24.091 --> 00:07:27.935 Again, you are on a lifelong journey.
00:07:27.935 --> 00:07:31.831 This doesn't end in two months, three months, a year.
00:07:31.831 --> 00:07:46.615 During your journey, there will be challenges, there will be detours and there will be obstacles that will delay you from reaching your destination.
00:07:46.615 --> 00:07:53.749 And here's one of my favorite phrases and, yes, you are allowed to use it that's okay.
00:07:53.749 --> 00:08:05.771 On your journey, you're going to have detours and so forth, and it's the same way if you're flying right and I don't know how many of you have ever flown.
00:08:05.771 --> 00:08:17.541 But and now we need to learn how to prepare say you know, something may happen, because on life's journey something will happen.
00:08:17.541 --> 00:08:21.228 I'm not going to say might, maybe it will.
00:08:21.228 --> 00:08:31.892 And here's your response that's okay, it's just a delay, but I'm still pushing forward to achieving my destination.
00:08:31.892 --> 00:08:37.500 Again, just acknowledge it's temporary and you keep pressing forward.
00:08:37.500 --> 00:08:46.052 We don't allow these distractions and delays to hinder achieving our destination.
00:08:46.052 --> 00:08:52.374 It's just a delay and you can tell yourself that, regardless of what that obstacle is, it's just a delay.
00:08:52.374 --> 00:08:56.447 I'm still pushing forward to reaching my destination.
00:08:56.447 --> 00:08:57.451 All right.
00:08:57.451 --> 00:09:02.183 So a couple of things you need to consider as you're on this journey.
00:09:02.985 --> 00:09:09.394 You know again, in past episodes I talked about personality types.
00:09:09.394 --> 00:09:12.929 Are you an introvert or are you an extrovert?
00:09:12.929 --> 00:09:15.769 Why is that important?
00:09:15.769 --> 00:09:22.714 Remember, introverts we because I am an introvert we like to stay to ourselves.
00:09:22.714 --> 00:09:25.706 We don't necessarily like crowds.
00:09:25.706 --> 00:09:33.095 We're okay with not being on the party scene, where an extrovert is the exact opposite.
00:09:33.095 --> 00:09:41.614 They like to mingle, they like to be out and hanging out with folks, and that's fine, there's nothing wrong with that.
00:09:41.960 --> 00:10:04.052 But you have to understand who you are, ma'am, as you develop your destination and as you start imagining where you want to be, because if you're an introvert, you have to look out for extrovert activities and think about those and how you're going to adjust to those and vice versa.
00:10:04.052 --> 00:10:09.451 So, an extrovert, they got to be out all the time and do this and that and the other.
00:10:09.451 --> 00:10:18.595 But on your journey, if it requires you to have some alone time, how are you going to deal with that?
00:10:18.595 --> 00:10:23.926 Because, remember, you're still out for that ultimate destination.
00:10:23.926 --> 00:10:31.676 Out for that ultimate destination and your destination is if I haven't mentioned it is releasing your children into the world to be productive citizens.
00:10:31.676 --> 00:10:48.360 No-transcript, you're an authoritative role and you have kids that are watching you that you're going to have to soon release them into the world so that they can be productive.
00:10:48.644 --> 00:10:51.895 So what does it mean to have an imagination?
00:10:51.895 --> 00:10:53.537 It invites purpose.
00:10:53.537 --> 00:11:00.788 Time and time again, I see young ladies saying I don't know what I'm doing, I want to give up, I'm just tired of being a mom.
00:11:00.788 --> 00:11:02.937 Really, all that is saying I don't know what I'm doing, I want to give up, I'm just tired of being a mom.
00:11:02.937 --> 00:11:06.308 Really, all that is saying I don't know what I'm doing.
00:11:06.308 --> 00:11:07.913 And you know what.
00:11:07.913 --> 00:11:14.851 I'm not pointing fingers because again, when I have my son, again, thank God for my mom.
00:11:14.851 --> 00:11:16.235 What am I doing?
00:11:16.235 --> 00:11:18.399 I'm who I get it, ladies.
00:11:19.164 --> 00:11:26.587 So that's even more important why you want to try to adopt this process or have that imagination.
00:11:26.587 --> 00:11:30.418 Because it is going to develop purpose.
00:11:30.418 --> 00:11:48.480 And once you develop that purpose, then now you have something to push forward to and now there's no longer a wonder of why or I want to give up, because now you have an understanding of where you want to go and how you want to get there.
00:11:48.480 --> 00:11:51.114 This is to invite critical thinking.
00:11:51.114 --> 00:11:55.537 So I kind of outlined a few things that you can consider.
00:11:55.537 --> 00:12:00.669 Use your imagination right, just like I'm using my imagination here.
00:12:01.412 --> 00:12:14.480 As far as to help you or set the foundation for your critical thinking, to begin your imagination, I recommend you start with having a three to five year plan.
00:12:14.480 --> 00:12:21.528 You don't want to do anything shorter than that, depending on where you are in life, but definitely between.
00:12:21.528 --> 00:12:36.004 Definitely have one at three years and one at five years, and keep in mind you're going to be three years older or five years older and your child is going to be three years older and five years older.
00:12:36.004 --> 00:13:02.759 So you have to think about those ages and where you're going to be to help you develop your plan, because right now you're young and spry and you're getting around and you're doing all of this, but, trust me, as an older person comes back to haunt you a little later on in life, you have to keep in mind your physical, how you feel physically and what do you look like.
00:13:02.759 --> 00:13:09.393 As part of your three to five year plan, here's a few things to consider as well.
00:13:09.393 --> 00:13:11.798 I already mentioned your age.
00:13:12.519 --> 00:13:19.533 Where do you want to live and why Do you still want to be at the same place you are now with your?
00:13:19.533 --> 00:13:26.528 I don't know if you're living with your parents or parent, or your renter or your homeowner.
00:13:26.528 --> 00:13:31.339 Where do you want to be in three years as it relates to where you are now?
00:13:31.339 --> 00:13:42.153 As far as living arrangements, yeah, that's important because as a renter there, you can call the maintenance man when something goes wrong.
00:13:42.153 --> 00:13:45.551 As a homeowner, you don't have that option.
00:13:45.551 --> 00:13:46.793 Ask me how I know.
00:13:46.793 --> 00:13:59.365 And if you don't have a piece of change sitting on the back burner, dig deep so it may not get fixed because now you got to pay out of your own pocket.
00:13:59.365 --> 00:14:07.995 Long story short again, where do you want to be in three to five years as it relates to your living arrangements?
00:14:07.995 --> 00:14:09.350 What about your job.
00:14:09.350 --> 00:14:11.373 A job just earns a paycheck.
00:14:11.373 --> 00:14:17.852 That's why so many people can leave from job to job, to job to job because it's just a paycheck.
00:14:17.852 --> 00:14:19.650 But do you want a career?
00:14:20.184 --> 00:14:25.986 Keep in mind this is where your personality traits also come into play.
00:14:25.986 --> 00:14:33.659 If you are an introvert, I recommend you don't go after an extrovert job.
00:14:33.659 --> 00:14:40.251 I say that because I was caught in that situation.
00:14:40.251 --> 00:14:48.927 I was miserable and I worked in sales for a good five years and I was miserable.
00:14:48.927 --> 00:14:50.690 Why was I miserable?
00:14:50.690 --> 00:14:56.100 Because it was a lot of people interaction involved.
00:14:56.100 --> 00:14:59.509 There was a lot of traveling involved.
00:14:59.509 --> 00:15:03.876 There was a lot of engagement with others.
00:15:03.876 --> 00:15:08.009 As an introvert, that's uncomfortable for me.
00:15:09.212 --> 00:15:18.551 Now, the time that I was a data analyst and I just extract data, sort data, export data, create my charts, create dashboards.
00:15:18.551 --> 00:15:20.153 I loved it why?
00:15:20.153 --> 00:15:28.831 Because all I had to do was analyze data and present it, and I didn't have to present it in front of people.
00:15:28.831 --> 00:15:32.826 I just shoot off an email and say let me know if you have questions.
00:15:32.826 --> 00:15:36.611 Even this podcast, right?
00:15:36.611 --> 00:15:51.297 I love it, ladies, as you are looking out and defining where you want to be in these next three to five years, consider your personality type and it's real easy.
00:15:51.356 --> 00:15:56.850 And if you still don't get it, here's a better way to understand it.
00:15:56.850 --> 00:15:59.615 You know the newscasters.
00:15:59.615 --> 00:16:03.701 You have the anchors that are in front of the camera.
00:16:03.701 --> 00:16:10.073 So I would consider them extroverts, right, because they're engaging with the public.
00:16:10.073 --> 00:16:18.076 Right, and if they're seen out in public, they're probably going to have somebody come up and say, hey, aren't you so-and-so from Channel 8 News?
00:16:18.076 --> 00:16:20.693 And they probably would be okay with that.
00:16:21.004 --> 00:16:29.293 And think about the introvert they're the ones behind the camera, the producers, the cameraman.
00:16:29.293 --> 00:16:36.296 So then you ask yourself, would I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind the camera?
00:16:36.296 --> 00:16:40.087 If you say in front of the camera, then you're probably an extrovert.
00:16:40.087 --> 00:16:43.236 If you say behind the camera, yeah, introvert.
00:16:43.236 --> 00:16:56.159 So hopefully that'll help you better understand your personality type, because it's going to be so important on this journey as you're striving to reach your destination.
00:16:56.159 --> 00:17:01.316 It also impacts how you react to different things.
00:17:01.316 --> 00:17:20.849 Right, and what you do that's your first task or piece of homework is understanding your personality type, because it's also going to impact your job, your career and where you want to go with that right and where you want to go with that right.
00:17:20.849 --> 00:17:35.488 Because I promise you, if you are in an introvert role, you do not want an extrovert job, and if you are an extrovert, you do not want an introvert job.
00:17:35.488 --> 00:17:37.919 You will be miserable.
00:17:37.919 --> 00:17:39.080 You will not stay.
00:17:39.080 --> 00:17:40.304 You will not stay.
00:17:40.304 --> 00:17:42.326 All right, let me keep moving.
00:17:42.326 --> 00:17:43.388 All right.
00:17:43.595 --> 00:17:45.060 What about your education?
00:17:45.060 --> 00:17:48.824 Okay, do you have your high school diploma?
00:17:48.824 --> 00:17:53.160 If you don't, do you want to get your high school diploma?
00:17:53.160 --> 00:18:00.589 So you'll need to research that to see how you can get your degree, your high school degree?
00:18:00.589 --> 00:18:03.742 Same thing Do you want a college degree?
00:18:03.742 --> 00:18:05.220 How do you do that?
00:18:05.220 --> 00:18:12.868 Now, for me, the manner I got mine is the job I work for offered tuition reimbursement.
00:18:12.868 --> 00:18:28.102 This is something you can ask for moms because, again, if you like me, you don't have the money to drop as it relates to getting higher education, but many of these employers offer that.
00:18:28.102 --> 00:18:35.226 And if you are looking for another job, one of your questions should be do you have tuition reimbursement?
00:18:35.226 --> 00:18:37.823 And I'd like to learn more about that program.
00:18:37.823 --> 00:18:46.307 And then there's other programs out there, but you're going to have to do your research on that to help you get your degree without going into debt.
00:18:46.515 --> 00:18:47.696 Here's another big one.
00:18:47.696 --> 00:18:51.423 I know I hear a lot relationship status.
00:18:51.423 --> 00:18:54.828 I hear so many young girls saying I'm so lonely.
00:18:54.828 --> 00:19:01.201 I'm so lonely, and I understand it, I get it Been there, done that as well.
00:19:01.201 --> 00:19:08.087 But you have to say well, what do I want as it relates to a relationship in three to five years?
00:19:08.087 --> 00:19:10.222 Do I want a situationship?
00:19:10.222 --> 00:19:16.167 And my understanding and the definition of that is nobody's really held accountable.
00:19:16.167 --> 00:19:18.923 There's no accountability.
00:19:18.923 --> 00:19:23.046 It's more like a friendship with benefits, I guess.
00:19:23.046 --> 00:19:27.416 But you can still do what you want, I guess, but anyway.
00:19:27.878 --> 00:19:28.983 Or do you want to be married?
00:19:28.983 --> 00:19:32.064 Maybe you want to be married in three to five years.
00:19:32.064 --> 00:19:33.440 What does that look like?
00:19:33.440 --> 00:19:34.303 And then why?
00:19:34.303 --> 00:19:34.953 Or do you still want to be single?
00:19:34.953 --> 00:19:35.263 And that's what you have?
00:19:35.263 --> 00:19:35.516 To be married in three to five years?
00:19:35.516 --> 00:19:35.787 What does that look like?
00:19:35.787 --> 00:19:35.847 And then why?
00:19:35.847 --> 00:19:36.181 Or do you still want to be single?
00:19:36.181 --> 00:19:38.201 And that's what you have to do?
00:19:38.201 --> 00:19:42.747 Ladies, you have to ask yourself well, why would I want to be in a situationship?
00:19:42.747 --> 00:19:55.675 Maybe you want a situationship because you don't want your kids exposed to anybody and everybody, so maybe that's why you want a situationship, body and everybody.
00:19:55.675 --> 00:19:56.818 So maybe that's why you want a situation share.
00:19:57.099 --> 00:20:01.412 Now, keep in mind I'm not advocating any of these, defining them and trying to get you to think that's it.
00:20:01.412 --> 00:20:03.636 I'm not saying, oh yeah, do that.
00:20:03.636 --> 00:20:04.740 That's not what I'm saying.
00:20:04.740 --> 00:20:08.816 If you want to be married, okay, well, that's great, but why?
00:20:08.816 --> 00:20:11.279 Because that is long-term as well.
00:20:11.279 --> 00:20:12.942 Why do you want to be married?
00:20:12.942 --> 00:20:17.730 What is it about marriage that you think is going to put you in a better position?
00:20:17.730 --> 00:20:30.267 And I would tell you to take finances out of the equation, because some people get married because of versus in spite of.
00:20:30.267 --> 00:20:31.500 Take that out of it.
00:20:31.855 --> 00:20:35.903 And if it's loneliness, okay, why are you lonely?
00:20:35.903 --> 00:20:44.647 What is it that you think he can do to fill that void, to shore up that loneliness that you have in your life?
00:20:44.647 --> 00:20:48.519 And, I would argue, take sex out of it.
00:20:48.519 --> 00:20:50.883 Would you still want to be with him?
00:20:50.883 --> 00:20:54.347 Because you have to define what loneliness is?
00:20:54.347 --> 00:21:12.036 And, moreover, you know the child deserves to have both parents in their lives, moms, and if you don't have a good relationship with their father number one, why Are you anticipating that within the next three years?
00:21:12.036 --> 00:21:14.260 How are y'all doing?
00:21:14.260 --> 00:21:16.405 Are y'all talking?
00:21:16.405 --> 00:21:21.743 And when I say y'all, you and the father, is he involved in the kids' lives?
00:21:21.743 --> 00:21:23.748 And especially if you have a son?
00:21:23.748 --> 00:21:31.481 So what does that look like in three years if you don't have a relationship with them now?
00:21:31.481 --> 00:21:34.645 And that can be a goal.
00:21:35.426 --> 00:21:44.015 Or you can imagine having your son or your son having a relationship with his dad, and even the daughter, don't get me wrong.
00:21:44.015 --> 00:21:47.165 I just think it's even more important for boys, that's all.
00:21:47.165 --> 00:21:50.998 Imagine that and you can start working on that now.
00:21:50.998 --> 00:22:01.722 Hey, pete, listen, I know we didn't make it, but we got little Johnny over here and I would like you to step up and do more.
00:22:01.722 --> 00:22:04.615 You can start there and it's just that simple.
00:22:04.615 --> 00:22:13.424 And a real dad would say, yeah, yeah, that's my boy, that's my boy.
00:22:13.424 --> 00:22:25.536 So he would agree, right, and y'all can work out the whole child support thing and all of that, as long as he's in the lives of the kids, because that's important.
00:22:25.536 --> 00:22:32.469 So you can put that in your imagination and again, think how their behavior will change.
00:22:32.469 --> 00:22:38.838 Think how their behavior will change right, knowing that their dad is there too, right, and not just you.
00:22:38.838 --> 00:22:39.779 So start imagining, ladies.
00:22:39.779 --> 00:22:44.327 This is your opportunity to really say so.
00:22:44.387 --> 00:23:09.538 By the time you get to that area of releasing them into the world, they have had the best of both worlds and it's okay that it didn't work out between y'all, it's okay, but you still should be civil enough to be there for the kids, because at the end of the day, they are what matter.
00:23:09.538 --> 00:23:21.156 And then, finally, as far as your imagination is concerned, and then, finally, as far as your imagination is concerned, if you're relatively young, are you wanting more kids and, if so, why?
00:23:21.156 --> 00:23:40.241 My question is if you're kind of struggling now emotionally, financially, and raising your child or your children, now, think hard why you would want another child within three to five years and who you're going to have that child with.
00:23:40.241 --> 00:23:46.522 So now you got to think about that last relationship and why it didn't work, because you definitely.
00:23:46.522 --> 00:23:52.442 If you see the same red flags with the next relationship, then why would you get into it?
00:23:52.442 --> 00:23:55.189 This is all about critical thinking, moms.
00:23:55.189 --> 00:24:10.086 That's all that is okay To get you to say, hmm, when I was with him, he was abusive or he'd leave and wouldn't come back till two days later and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:24:10.086 --> 00:24:11.837 What caused that?
00:24:11.837 --> 00:24:18.060 Right, did you ever have that conversation with them versus getting into that next relationship?
00:24:18.060 --> 00:24:22.375 So think about that as I round out and finish this up.
00:24:22.776 --> 00:24:54.703 So today's world, we have the global positioning system, or GPS, and anytime we want to go somewhere, we put in our address of where our destination is to help us get there, and they give us tips and tricks and let us know if the cops are out and you know there's going to be a detour or a delay, or a car is stalled in the right lane or the left lane, and it gives you all this fun information as you go on your journey.
00:24:54.703 --> 00:25:02.125 So now, ladies, you are on the journey of life, so what's our GPS going to be?
00:25:02.125 --> 00:25:05.951 Well, I'm so glad you asked me.
00:25:05.951 --> 00:25:09.718 I recommend you download OneNote.
00:25:09.718 --> 00:25:22.672 It's an app and in that One note I would recommend you jot down or imagine three things you want to achieve in three to five years.
00:25:22.672 --> 00:25:40.586 Again, you can change the frequency, you can change how many, you can put one, if you want, of where you want to be, because sometimes you need to start small, right, but this is you, but this is just planting the seed to help you start thinking about it.
00:25:40.586 --> 00:25:42.057 I say one note.
00:25:42.439 --> 00:25:58.181 I have a laptop, a tablet and, of course, my phone, and there are times when, again, I wake up in the middle of the night and I told you I'm an overthinking introvert and I'm thinking about something.
00:25:58.181 --> 00:26:06.261 I'll quickly grab my phone, open OneNote and capture my thought, because once I go back to sleep I'll forget it.
00:26:06.261 --> 00:26:08.287 Right, and I think it's a really good thought.
00:26:08.287 --> 00:26:16.609 It's on my phone and then when I come and get on my laptop, you know I can easily open OneNote there because it follows you.
00:26:16.609 --> 00:26:18.619 So I guess that's a long story short.
00:26:18.619 --> 00:26:25.286 Onenote follows you on your devices and so when you do that, you can always have it there.
00:26:25.775 --> 00:26:47.122 Now the next step to that is add a reminder either to your calendar or to an app on your phone for three months, because now you've already jotted down your destination or where you want to be in three to five years and you've taken some of the things that I mentioned in consideration.
00:26:47.122 --> 00:26:52.539 Now you want to go back and say, okay, how am I doing?
00:26:52.539 --> 00:26:54.584 Because that's what the reminder is.
